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From: elf@coho.halcyon.com (Elf Sternberg)
Newsgroups: alt.sex,alt.sex.wizards,alt.sex.anal
Subject: The alt.sex FAQ, Part 9: ANAL SEX AND ANALINGUS
Date: 23 Jul 1996 19:11:56 GMT
Organization: Northwest Nexus Inc.
Originator: superdj@marge.cs.mcgill.ca (David Johnson)
Moderator: elf@halcyon.com
Archive-name: alt-sex/faq/part09

ANAL INTERCOURSE AND ANALINGUS

Why would anyone want to have anal sex?

For many people, anal sex is the ultimate taboo.  Buttfucking makes 
it sound crude and dirty, sodomy sounds technical.  In the 1990's, 
anal sex has been given the bad rap because of HIV, the virus that 
causes AIDS, is most easily transmitted by anal intercourse.   But 
some people love anal sex.  Others hate it.  Others haven't tried it 
yet and are curious.  And many people are attracted to it precisely 
because it's so taboo and mysterious.  


What is analingus?

One other part of the body that some people enjoy licking, or having 
licked, is the anus.  The anus has half the nerve endings in the 
pelvic region and many people find touching it to be sexually 
arousing.  Although we haven't mentioned safer sex yet as part of 
this series, we will here: the anus and rectum carry many diseases 
that live quite benignly in your lower digestive tract, but which can 
be harmful in your mouth or stomach.  Performing anilingus is a very 
risky behavior for a variety of bacterial infections.  Refer to the 
section on safer sex techniques for ways to protect yourself if you 
or your partner enjoys this activity.  


Does anal sex hurt?

Anal sex should not hurt.  If it hurts, you're doing it wrong.  With 
enough lubricant and enough patience, it's entirely possible to enjoy 
anal sex as a safe and fulfilling part of your sex life.  However, 
some people may never like it, and if your lover is one of those 
people, respect their limits.  Don't force the idea upon them.  


Can anal sex actually give pleasure?

The pleasure of anal sex is derived from many things.  Doing 
something "nasty" appeals to many people, especially about sex.  
Doing something different to spice up a sex life that has become 
something of a bore can be part of it.  And the physical sensations 
available during anal sex are uniquely different from anything else.  
The rectum is lined with nerve endings, some of which signal the 
brain to 'reward' you with good feelings when stimulated.  For men, 
the prostate gland can be a source of powerful pleasure.  And for a 
thrusting penis, the tight ring of the anus can be a new and strong 
sensation to enjoy.  


What do I need to have anal sex?

The most important pieces of advice anyone can give on anal sex are: 
lubricants, condoms, and patience.  The most commonly available 
lubricant is KY-Jelly, a greaseless, odorless substance available at 
most drug stores.  Better lubricants include Astroglide, ID, Wet, or 
ForePlay, some of which are available at better drug stores, and most 
of which are available in some form at adult toy stores.   Do not buy 
anything that is oil-based.  Make sure the lubricant you buy is rated 
"condom compatible." Nothing else will do.  Oil- based lubricants 
such as vaseline or baby oil will destroy a condom long before you're 
done having sex.  And many oil-based sub- stances will coat the 
lining of the rectum, providing a haven for many potential 
infections.  


Do I have to use a condom?

Even if you're sure that both you and your partner are disease- free, 
using a condom is still a good idea.  The rectum is home to lots of 
infectious bacteria that can cause burning and urethritis of the 
penis.  It will also help you clean up afterwards.  


I'm worried that anal sex will be messy.

 Anal sex can be messy, but such a mess can be avoided; after all, 
most people can tell when they have to go to the bathroom.  A condom 
will help with cleanup, of course, and if you're really concerned, a 
commercial enema, like Fleet, will help beforehand.  If you do use a 
commercial enema, read the instructions carefully.


How do we prepare for anal sex?

Patience is the third and final thing you need to make anal sex 
possible.  Initial penetration is always the most difficult part of 
anal sex-- the anus is a tight ring of flesh at the opening of the 
rectum designed to control the elimination of bodily waste.  It is 
partially under voluntary control, and partially reflexive to stim- 
ulation.  Your partner has to relax, and you have to go slow to coax 
it into opening enough to recieve your penis.   Start with a well-
lubricated finger or a slim (smaller than your penis) dildo.  The 
dildo is more realistic, but your fingers can flex and feel what 
they're doing inside her ass.  Slide one finger in slowly, letting 
her adjust to it.  Take your finger all the way out, then push it 
back in again.  Give her anus time to get used to this kind of 
activity.  Then slide a second finger in.  Consider how big your 
penis is and realize that two fingers is probably enough.  


What position should we use for anal sex?

For actual intercourse, picking a position can be important.  Many 
women want to be on top, to regulate how fast penetration occurs.  
Other like to lie on their stomachs, or crouch doggy-style, or to be 
penetrated while lying on their sides.  Choose what's best before you 
start.   As always, control yourself.  Take your time and use lots of 
lubricant.  People who like anal sex say that "too much lube is 
almost enough." Listen to your partner-- if she tells you it starts 
to hurt, back off.   Eventually, a time will come during your 
lovemaking where her anus will relax enough to allow the head of your 
cock to 'pop' into her.  If she is completely relaxed, that pop 
should feel completely painless.  Now just because you're inside her 
is no reason to start pounding away like mad.  Let her body adjust.  
Take your time.  Eventually you will both be ready for more.  


Can I get pregnant from anal sex?

It is not *technically* possible to get pregnant from anal sex; there 
is no way for semen to get from the rectal tract to the vaginal 
tract.   However, anal sex is still not a very good method of birth 
control.  Semen leaking from the anus after intercourse may drip 
across the perineum (the short stretch of skin separating vulva and 
anus) and cause what is known as a 'splash' conception.  The failure 
rate for this is surprisingly high! 8% of couples of who use anal sex 
as a method of birth control have babies each year.  


What if I don't like it?

You may find that anal sex just isn't for you.  That's fine.  Nothing 
says that you have to indulge in something that doesn't make you feel 
good.
--

Elf Sternberg               	I'm not inclined to write pompous
elf@halcyon.com             	books about unanswerable questions.
Public key available        	That strikes me as a tremendous waste
http://www.halcyon.com/elf  	of time.
                            			- Stephen Jay Gould